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Team play 16 commandments

Posted 11-28-2010 at 06:20 AM by Loki
Updated 11-28-2010 at 05:59 PM by Loki
I, like many airsofters, am an avid video gamer. I enjoy many games, from FPS games to RPGs to RTS games. In my travels as a gamer, I have discovered that there is a distinct lack of actual team play present in games that are supposed to be team-oriented, whether they be FPS or RTS games. So bearing the above comments in mind, I have decided to create this list of team-play commandments.

1. Thou shalt not call in artillery strikes on friendly forces.

2. Thou shalt not use friendly forces as bait for thy artillery strikes without their consent.

3. If thou art calling in artillery, thou shalt inform they teammates before doing so, so that thy teammates have a chance to vacate the area of said artillery strike. This does not entitle thou to break rules 1 or 2.

4. Thou shalt continue covering corridors that thou have been covering, for not doing so inevitably means thy teammates will get flanked and killed whilst thou art off being Rambo.

5. Thou shalt not pickup equipment from thy teammates body after they have parished due to thy violations of rule 4.

6. Thou shalt not randomly run around narrow corridors when thy teammate is attempting to fire grenade launchers down it, thereby causing thy teammate to blow up due to the fact that thy melon detonated a grenade too close to said teammate, killing them. (Thou art also required to inform thy teammates that thou art deploying explosives).

7. Thou shalt not use grenade launchers in proximity to thy teammates in games in which friendly fire is on.

8. If thou seest armor laying on the ground, thou shalt not pick up said armor unless thou lacketh armor, especially when thy teammates lack any form of it.

9. Thou will not pickup ammo crates unless thou art actually in need of them.

10. If thou hath a specific job (such as a Medic, or a class built to hunt larger specimens), thou will perform thy task before any other thing.

11. Thy medic is the most important person on the field, and must be protected at all costs, even at the cost of thy own life.

12. If any of thy teammates are close to death, thou will expendth any resources thou possessth in an attempt to save thy teammate.

13. Thou will not act like Rambo in team oriented games.

14. Thou shalt not stack in narrow corridors when thy teammate is attempting to avoid being face raped by Fleshpounds, Skrakes, or anything else large and nasty.

15. Thou shalt not act surprised when thy repeated violations of these commandments earns thou the ire of thy teammates.

16. If thou is in the presence of someone that has repeatedly violated these commandments, thou shalt do everything possible to assure the death of said teammate, until the offending behavior is stopped; for the presence of offending teammates endangers the rest of thy team. This commandment list does NOT apply when dealing with these individuals. However, thou will not violate these commandments when thy other non-offending teammates are put at risk as well.

(The games, in case any of you were wondering, are "Killing Floor" and "Dawn of War II", both for the PC.)

*ETA* Now that I think about it, most of these apply to airsoft as well.
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Total Comments 5


  1. Old
    Gerber's Avatar
    Hahaha. i need to shows this to the guys i play DoD with. Rules 1-5 are violated SO much.
    Posted 11-28-2010 at 12:41 PM by Gerber Gerber is offline
  2. Old
    Carnival's Avatar
    "I don't need a team when I'm so awesome at this game!"
    Grr... then play by yourself jerk wad.
    I agree with these commandments. I would like them posted on all steam servers.
    Posted 11-28-2010 at 08:38 PM by Carnival Carnival is offline
  3. Old
    Baked Juice's Avatar
    Yay verily.
    Posted 11-29-2010 at 08:02 PM by Baked Juice Baked Juice is offline
  4. Old
    Cody Chaos's Avatar
    haha my favorite comendment is 16, but i like this nice work!
    Posted 12-05-2010 at 08:43 PM by Cody Chaos Cody Chaos is offline
  5. Old
    if your looking for a team style milsim video game. try operation flashpoint, dragon raising. best misim game for online play ever
    Posted 12-06-2010 at 10:28 AM by soldier of fortune soldier of fortune is offline

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